a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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whats worse than your computer crashing? your plane crashing...twice

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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Hey, look under there! Under what?

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Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

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What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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