How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

So. The gays. ...

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

What's funnier than poop? More poop

What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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