Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

thumb_up thumb_down +23

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having an apple at all. Yet only worms to eat, such as the the poverty stricken citizens of Ethiopia.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why are fat people fat? Because they like food.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q:why did the woman make a sandwitch. A: cause she is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock! Who's there? So. So who? Cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What just hit my face? The floor

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the homeless man get for his birthday. Nothing. Get it: He lived a life along with a giant family and on christmas eve 2012 he broke his kneecap and was in the E.R. He got out of the hospital on christmas only to come home to find a burning house; his house. Every member in his family died except for him as they were all in the house when it caught on fire. The house completely burnt and crumbled, and that is why he is homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops