what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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What's the cure to Ebola? Suicide

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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What did the Hobo get for Christmas? Nothing,He celebrated Hanukkah.

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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