How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

If I get 100 likes by tomorrow I will send 100 dollars to who ever likes it if the put down their address and say its for Louis Ok?

A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

haha, you're an orphan

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...