friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

What do you call a person with no life. Dead.

What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

Why did Billy want cancer? So he could be like his parents.

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

Q: What do you call a black girl with braces? A: A black and decker pecker wrecker

how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...