What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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WHO LIVES IN A TIN SHACK THUMB MOUNTNORIS ALCATRAZ MAGHBARREY MUSTARD GAS MILK STAIN REGESTERED S.O SCREAMS MADELINN SBB OPERATION SBB FREE MEAT SANTA GREASE 590 ENGLISH FOLDER SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A snake walks into a bar

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "hey. get out."

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why don't you ask him, o wait he's a chicken, you cant ask him. he is incapeable of speaking.

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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the real mccoy

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Two gay men walked into a bar in a bigoted, small-minded town and were beaten to death with shoes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others dont

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One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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