You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

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h

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

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Call or text this number and say whatever 863-670-1547 or you can mail things to his house 252 village crest court lakeland florida 33809

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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What is funnier than a barrel full of clowns? The holocaust.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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