- Anti Joke

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

how many rapists does it take to screw a lightbulb?

What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

.""-. |a a \ \ / | '-') ; _/ /_ .'/ ; '. / / |'. \ | | '._\ | | | | | \ \_ _.// jgs '._`""`_.' `""`

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

I saw a chameleon. Then it died

Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

Two black guys jump off a cliff, who wins? The black guy.

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

Fire extinguishers are sexy.