Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

What is next?

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

Are you a human?

Women Voting

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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