Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

42

thumb_up thumb_down -22

XD I must like, really be into you, God I cannot breathe XD, that is like the most disgusting thing I have heard in my life, but coming from you that just comes out so quaint! XD

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

i dislike sack in my mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops