What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

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knock knock who's there? Barbra Streisand Barbra Streisand who? Barbra? Streisand whoo oo oooo oo oo oo ooo ooo!

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Q: What do you call a black girl with braces? A: A black and decker pecker wrecker

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

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Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

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friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

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What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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Poop

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2

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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