- Anti Joke

womens rights to vote

What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

Jared Gough is a slut

Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road The light was green

general tso's broccoli

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the Nazi shoot the Jew in the head? Because he was a Jew. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

Hey, we're both lawyers.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike?.. She was 4 and hadn't learned how to ride a bike yet... Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?.. It was stapled to the first monkey... Why was Suzie angry?.. Her parents had only found one bike at the marketplace... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?.. It thought it was a game... Why did the fridge fall out of the tree?.. It had no arms... Lucy fall off her bike?.. She was crushed by 3 monkeys and a fridge... There's 500 bricks on a plane and you throw one out, how many are left?.. 499 bricks... How do you get an elephant into a fridge?.. Open the fridge, take the elephant out, close the fridge... How do you get a deer into a fridge?.. Open the fridge, take the elephant out, close the fridge... The lion is celebrating his birthday and, being the king of the jungle, all the other animals were in attendance except for one... Why?.. The deer was in the fridge... Little Mia is looking for Lucy and comes across an alligator-infested river... How does she cross it?... She swam... The alligators are at the lion's party... She died anyways, though... What happened?.. A brick fell on her head... Why did Suzie fall off the swing?.. She was trampled by the elephant, who was in a hurry to get to the lion's party in time... Why did the ethologist couple commit suicide?.. Their 3 daughters there killed by a brick, an elephant and 3 dead monkeys followed by a fridge... Note: yeah not 100% original, i mixed some already existing jokes together... works better if you don't tell them all at once but sprinkle them in with lots of other unrelated jokes...

whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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