what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a fish with no "eyes" Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Wanna hear a funny joke? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a female ant walks into a bar... and someone steps on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call someone who kills jews? a life saver

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops