A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Fire extinguishers are sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I know a black girl named beyonca.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops