Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

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Why do you believe in evolution? Because it increases the power of my pokemon.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

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Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

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And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

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Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

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why didn't little johnny show up to school on friday? little johnny died two months ago from cancer. he hasn't been to school in a year.

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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lick my ballsack.... ok

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whats brown and smells like shit shit

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Barack Obama

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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