Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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How did the priest die? Masterbation

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Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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Q: What's the worst part about being a black Jew? A: You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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Q: What sucks? A: Straws

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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kiss me?

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop? It very depending on the amount of saliva produced in ones mouth..

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

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Why do black people suck? Because they're black

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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