wanna hear a joke? not really

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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How do u shit With ur ass

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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Where's my tractor?

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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9/11

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

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A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

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Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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