Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

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Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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We didnt star the fire ...........

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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Why did you visit antijoke.com? Because you don't find real jokes funny.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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you

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why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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what do you call three kkk guys in your house ghost busters

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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