Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

Sorry boss

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

baby loves lalma

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

Canada

Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Doorbell salesman.

Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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