why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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Hey man have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? ... Neither has he

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I THINK I SEE BIGFOOT O is yo mom!! -____-

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Hi

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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Q: Why isn't Michael Jordan able to jump into space with only 1 leap? A: If that were possible, the supposedly absolute laws of physics would've been irreversibly violated to the full extent that the future of science would be in trouble and the future of some already mentally-unstable people would've been deeply jeopardized to a state that they couldn't naturally recover from.

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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http://anti-joke.com/

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

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knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

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Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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