What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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?????????????????????? ????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ...?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? you mad?

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y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

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What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

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What is it called when a male and a male are together. A relationship

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Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

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Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

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"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

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a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

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After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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Have you ever heard of Yoda? From 'Attack of the Clones'?

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Knock knock It's open

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What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

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Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

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If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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