whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

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y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

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If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

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What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

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What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

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q: whys this website gay a: kids like jaali,pawgee, and mutt

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop

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Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? Literally an endless list of things.

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A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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