Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

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What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

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Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

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A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

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Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

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minecraft

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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