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Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

My name is never spelt right so its all good

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

What;s worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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