Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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knock knock go away ok

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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Penis

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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Where's my tractor?

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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