The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Nobody cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Guess What? What? Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops