Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

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A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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anne hatthaway

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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Women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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