The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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i tped this with my toiung. now i hve germs

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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What happens when Brittany Spears is hungry? She goes to taco bell for food

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

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Knock knock Who's there My dick

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Imagine: You are trapped in a prizon cell with no doors, no windows, no furniture and completely sealed in with nothing. What do you do? Stop imagining!

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What is worse than getting the wrong haircut at a hair salon? A terrible shooting at your local Chuck-E-Cheese

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops