Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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Betty Whites ALIVE?

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Ass

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

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What's cold and icy? Ice

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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"knock knock" "who's there?" "its your girlfriend, lets have sex"

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this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

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Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

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What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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