Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

Ass

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

what do you call a black man named mike

What is annoying and orange? An annoying orange.

why did i fall? i got pushed!

Dislike this

How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

asian drivers.

Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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