Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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A jew went to Germany.

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John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

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waiter there's a fly in my alphabet soup that's not a fly that's a spelling bee

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A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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What dud the dorito say to the other dorito? Nothing. Sorosis are incapable of speaking because they are doritos

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

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Yo mamma so crazy She chloroformed a 4 year old and put her in her trunk and no one has ever heard of her since.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Because he was shot.

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Why didn't Erick have a party last week? Because his grandma died

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Q.why did the chicken cross the road A. To eat some Kentucky Fried Chicken get it KFC

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Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A satisfied elephant and a dead poodle.

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A black man hailed a taxi cab. He got in, and the taxi drove him to his destination for an appropriate fee.

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Chrissy is funny.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

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What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops