What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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Black Veil Brides.

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what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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