Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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how did the little girl die cancer

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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What's a small person? A midget

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What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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