What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

Potato.

What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

Two women were sitting quietly.

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

helen keller's dad put a plunger in the toilet and left it there. helen then went to use the bathroom....

What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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