Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

Knock knock (No one is home)

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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