How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

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George Bush.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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Knock knock. Who's there? James. James who? You know, from across the road? But where's the punchline? This isn't a joke. Isn't it? No. Can you still add a punchline? OPEN THE DOOR!

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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