A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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HAPPY NOVEMBER 2

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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