What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

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There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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George Bush.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

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Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops