A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

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you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Because he was shot.

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what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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What's the difference between John Candy and Chris Farley? Nothing. They're both dead.

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Hello

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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a retard lost...

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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what is stupid and reading this you

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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whats red and spikey? an apple i lied about the spikes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

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There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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Lil' Wayne

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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a guy walks into a bar the barman says "what'll it be?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops