What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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whats cheese thats not yours? the one in the toilet.

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what has 9 legs, 4 feet and is orange? nothing.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see.

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Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

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A rabbit enters in apharmacy and asks for a carrot. The man says:"There aren´t any carrots in here." In the next two days the same happens, but the man replies that he'll hammer the rabbit if he comes back. In the other day, the rabbit is found dead with a bloody hammer nearby.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

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Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

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4/20.

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Every time you make fun of an Ethiopian child he dies a little on the inside.. But that's probably just from the hunger..

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What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

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a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

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Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. He never got an ice cream he is alergic.

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Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken!!!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Getting aids from that apple.

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What is it called when a male and a male are together. A relationship

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what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

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there are three dudes one is white, one is mexican, one is black so a wizard says wish of something you want to be and jump off the roof. so the white guy wishes to be and eagle and jumps off and is an eagle the mexican wishes to be an owl and jumps off an becomes an owl then the black guy wishes he had to shit and jumps off and falls to the ground cause he turns into shit.

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Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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