Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Fire extinguishers are sexy.

I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

What is good about the holocaust? It is over

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

Your mother is so ugly, because she was badly beaten.

why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

knock knock who's there?

A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

A guys walks up to a drug dealing looking to score some drugs. The deal was made an the man quickly arrested the drug dealer because he was actually a undercover cop

dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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