A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

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You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

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Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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A guys walks up to a drug dealing looking to score some drugs. The deal was made an the man quickly arrested the drug dealer because he was actually a undercover cop

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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What is good about the holocaust? It is over

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A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

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Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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