Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

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stop it ryan vallee

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Why did Adele suck the doctors dick? LOL, did you think the doctor really got her to open her mouth all the time so he could "look at her sick throat"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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