i love antijokes

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Good.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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your mom

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What's blue and smells like yellow paint? Blue paint.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Rock mattress.

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

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Why can't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

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Q:When a terrorist attack happened what did the woman with the 1 leg say? A: HOP for your lives!!!!

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Why didn't Peter get anything from his parents for Christmas? His parents have been dead for 5 years

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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