why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Women's football

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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There's no "i" in tim.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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