Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

thumb_up thumb_down +15

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"Up to 50% off."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is this a chair?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock What

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

thumb_up thumb_down +7

tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +5

anne hatthaway

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops