Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because skeletons are no longer sentient beings and cannot move.

Will you marry me?

Why did the leprechian meleste Justin Bieber? ..... He stole his lucky charms.

what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

Boobs are nasty!

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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