A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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Obama

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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What's cold and icy? Ice

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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( o Y o )

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What do you call a Chinese man in a cage full of Ostridges? A zoo worker.

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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women

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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