Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

Why did the child die? Natural causes.

The Charlotte bobcats.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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