If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

Why was Timmy sad?

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

knock knock

like for a handjob.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...