What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock, knock. Come in.......

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops