A: Knock knock. B: <>

A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...