Knock, knock. Come in.......

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

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whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

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Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

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Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

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A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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