man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Canada

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What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

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Smart Blondes

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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